I swear it, the wondering of someone likes you the way that you like them is one of the most frustrating things in the world! The most frustrating thing about it is, I'm the kind of person that gets affirmation from the way someone reacts to me. If they react favorably, I know that they like me, if it feels more like a brush off, I move on. I make a new friend, but I don't think about her again.
This last one though, I'm being stretched at two ends. She acknowledges my presence when I enter a room, but its tough to speak to her. I say something that makes her laugh, but I cant get her to continue laughing. I want to know whats on this woman's mind, but I have know clue. I wish I could read her mind, but then the excitement of asking her, if I ever could, would be gone. I want to know this woman, but for the first time in a long time, I'm afraid. I'm afraid I'm staring into a future that is...
Seriously, what word could possibly finish that? Unknown? Unclear? Hopeful? Impossible? Yes, shes given me a lot of hope even though she doesn't know it yet. She may never know it. However, she makes me want to be a better man. A truly better man. She makes me want to increase my character tenfold, hundredfold, thousandfold. I want to be better for her. I see her smile, and I see her eyes right when a decision about my character needs to be made.
Maybe God placed her here as a guide, but I think I would like it more if I could have an equal connection with her. If I knew that she wanted to get to know me too.
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